This is familiar to everyone: whatever is that you do there is always a moment when you encounter it and being struck by it - frustration. Most people instinctively shy away, get angry, and stop the activity that causes it. In my experience, this is a huge mistake.
It is important to distinguish this - frustration and anger are not the same thing. They are related emotions, but they affect our psychological and physical state very differently. Anger is an emotion that usually is a response to a threat or embarrassment, when frustration is the reaction to the obstacles or when our efforts are not working as expected. Frustration makes us feel upset and vulnerable whereas anger often causes a physical reaction. Long-lasting frustration can make us angry.
Whenever you learn something new, you will inevitably feel frustrated at some point. Often it puts the end to the effort – our ego comes along and it doesn’t like to feel this way. Frustration occurs when we are not good enough at something or our plans are getting intervened abruptly. It shows us our blind spots and weak links or our inability to control the course of events. It is the moment when this inner voice familiar to everyone appears, it makes you want to put your hands down and quit. This is your ego being hurt: it always wants to be on top of things. It is not to say that we need completely to get rid of the ego, no. Ego is a very important part of human personality, without it we would not be able to function in the world and interact with each other. It is what makes you want to learn something new in the first place. But oftentimes when it doesn’t get what it wants easily, it contracts, so It makes you shrink and run in the opposite direction from the situation that caused the problem.
In generalist movement practice, you will suffer a lot if you won’t learn to work with frustration, or you will simply quit. I have seen it many times – people getting very excited at the beginning and as soon as they encounter something that is not so easy for them, or doesn’t show an immediate result, they are out. The reality is - frustration is a great thing, it shows you the areas for growth. When we are tuned into feeling good all the time, we miss the opportunity to develop. Probably the most useful skill I can think of in life is being able to recognize and work with frustration in a calm, discreet manner. Relax and lean into it, see what it can teach you. Frustration forces us to be more creative, it forces us to stop and look closer at what we are doing. When we slow down and pay attention to the process – something magical happens.
Ivan Abadjiev, the famous Bulgarian weightlifting coach, was training his athletes in Spartan conditions – no chalk was used on the old rusty bars in an old soviet basement and he made them do hardcore multiple session a day that would go against any conventional system even today. Ivan has created many Olympic medalists - Bulgarian school is still considered a reference for the weightlifting. So why did they had such great results? When his athletes were training in such, seemingly, horrific conditions, the perfectly adjusted equipment of the competition was a children’s toy for them.
Brian Eno, a brilliant musician who has collaborated with many prominent figures in pop culture, has originated a whole system for boosting creativity that is based on invoking frustration. He contributed to the work of iconic figures like David Bowie, Luciano Pavarotti, U2, and others. Imagine those people would drop what they were doing as soon as they felt slightly frustrated? We would not have any art at all.
There is one thing I know for sure – there was not a single time when I regretted continuing to do something I felt frustrated with. With time I have learned to not let it take me off track and even enjoy the moment when I find something that evokes this feeling. And my advice to everyone would be this: next time you encounter this fuzzy feeling of being frustrated by something – look at it closer. It contains a huge opportunity to grow. If you learn to pause, slow down and calmly continue in the same direction – there is a beautiful world waiting for you on the other side, a world where you can become whoever you wish to be.